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Depressed and Unskilled Youth

It is quite often we see the youth being less happy, more lonely, and depressed. In addition to that, as the internet world has emerged suddenly, there is a whole revolution to adapt to it. To run with the technology is an enormous task. The thing is you can never cope with it, and usually, people forget to live.

We are often told that we are what we do most of the time waking. If I spend time being idle and waste it on a mobile game, I just become a very good player, and that too in the particular game. It is a simple rule of life : You are, what you do most of your time.

When I wake up I sometimes think, I got this chunk of time twenty-four hours to make the best use of it, and then it goes by and I don’t even remember what I did in the morning. Especially, when everything you do seems insignificant or routine, you won’t remember the things you do most of the time. The memory gets distorted and so our sense of living and we forget that we lived in that particular moment.

I would point out a few things which, in my opinion, could be the reason for youth to be depressed and unskilled:

  1. The pressure of earning your living and get settled: This pressure will either make someone to get a job which they don’t like or it can make them idler as the pressure becomes gigantic to handle.
  2. Handling lots of information: Being exposed to lots of information, exhaust us. Even we are exposed to a whole lot of information, the surprising fact is our brain still feels bored. It is now bored with plenty of something rather than lack of something. When you get things little by little, you cherish every bit of them but when it is given to you at once, you cherish it as a whole and in general. You lose interest fast, the thing has nothing more to offer now.
  3. Passion to follow: It is not necessary that you may have a distinct passion for something right now. Many times we hear famous or successful people saying “I would have progressed more if I had known this skill earlier.” The reality is: there is a time for everything. Our state of mind changes as we grow up, and so our passion for something.
  4. Education does not relate to the job opportunities: It is the reason why there are so many unskilled youths. They don’t know what to do with their lives once they are done with education. Education was needed to narrow down our choices and make us work for something which we have an interest in, instead, it is driven by the general interest of the people.
  5. Fast pace life: If you feel that the time is running and you need to achieve something as some people of your age are doing it. Remember, everyone has their own time and it is not the reason to sit idle but it is the reason to explore your interest and work upon it. 

You will learn, getting everything at once without any struggle, and problem-solving is not worth having. There is no easy money, so it is better to make yourself skilled by engaging in activities that are worth working for.

Depression and mediocrity are so common in major cities that it is becoming a norm. If you think you cannot cope with this city world and this kind of population, just move. Move to your own tribe, live with them, and experience the moments. Life is not figuring out why you are here, it is about living it with love and a conscious mind.

Half-hearted Novel

I have seen a very good story written badly. That’s what scares me the most of writing down my own novel. I want to give my story justice. I don’t care if it will be popular or not, but I want my debut book to be something  meaningful.

In the Indian market, the ruling writers like Chetan Bhagat and Durjoy Dutta might well be very good with commercial writings. Though, their quality of novels are degrading day by day. I know this is a criticism, not constructive but a general view.

I was shocked when Chetan Bhagat’s novel was about to enter in Delhi University’s syllabus! The absence of a good content is prevalent. While these writers are writing screenplays for the bollywood in the name of writing novel, the best writers are hidden behind the veil of commercialization.

I don’t even think of writing if it isn’t good but these writers give me motivation to pen down something. :’)

In Alexander Pope’s Dunciad , there is a mention of “hack writers”. These writers are those who write low quality books, basically someone who pretends to be a writer.

It would be better if more of the commercialization goes for writing skills not because of social connection or money.

Writing helps Dealing with Anxiety

I read an article about how writing helps in dealing with anxiety. I used to write all the time whenever I was anxious. It helped me to express my thoughts in a clear way but it didn’t do anything else. Now, I realize that it wasn’t reflective and not honest.

Whenever I used to write it down, I always see it with someone else’s eyes. This made me write only good things about myself or modified version of things, which was far from the truth. No wonder it didn’t help!

To reflect on my writing was to relive those anxieties again. I almost never read it again. At one time, I opened my notebook where I have written an entry of two years back. When I reflected upon my mental conditions now and then, it was still the same.

I was writing the same thing again and again and that too for years! I had those same anxieties and same fears and I have not done anything about it. It is still there, gnawing my happiness little by little.

That article, made me realize I have to be honest with myself while writing my feelings down (no matter how stupid or obscure my feelings are).

I have to be reflective, so that I can learn to improve my mistakes and avoid repeating it.

I need to do it in a safe space where I can feel that no one else would go through it.

I will update this blog post after a week, about my findings following the advice.

Post COVID lockdown scenario

I have been at home for so long that if I go out I feel tired and exhausted. Our home is our comfort zone, wearing whatever we like and doing work whenever we want.

In the lockdown, I was bored and the physical movement was way less than before. Now, when everything is again going back to normal, the crippling effect comes, which just makes one stay in the comfort zone.

The people who go out for work are feeling the strain. Not only they are trying to re-adapt to the normal work situation but also trying to be safe in the still vulnerable environment. 

The battle is on, no matter what we think, we can never be carefree and casual like before. Death stalks in the veil of a disease. It is the state of confusion and depression, confusion to not be able to do anything about it and depression to know that it won’t be same normal as before.

Life cannot stand still, only death can. If life is stagnated by the deadly disease lurking around the corner then how can a normal being be set free.

The problem. At first, it was about jobs, loans, etc and now it was all about the life itself. Even if we still worry about the mundane things, we now know where we are standing and how contaminated the ground is. We humans, cannot stop and let us get rid of this deadly disease.

We are not letting it go by acting everything is okay. It is perhaps okay to live in such conditions. A human can adapt into any situation to survive. I am not sure when our survival is on test here.

The Perils of being an Introvert

Why anyone is introvert? Isn’t it better to communicate more and socialize? We humans are after all social animal. Common myth about introverts is that they don’t like socializing at all. The truth is: Introverts like socializing but with a certain set of people in a limited period of time.

When bombarded with lots of people to an introvert, scientists observed a phenomenon called “social burnout” (P.S an introvert was burnt today at the stake of people :’)).They are not able to keep appearances , function less efficiently  or sometimes not function at all (they just wait for the nightmare to end).

Some of the perils which is quite evident for an introvert around people are as follows:

1. To keep up the appearance and act interested when actually they would rather read a book.

2. No privacy. They are all over them and it just gets out of hand sometimes. While other personality types would get over with this breach of boundaries, for an introvert it takes a hell lot of time.

3. All the time people ask them to speak up.
Introverts don’t speak up because they don’t choose to. Period. You cannot rack out words from them for the sake of what? Just words?!

4. People consider them boring.
Introverts definition of boring is similar to the extroverts definition of fun. Sing in public? No.
This prejudice only creates a misunderstanding, many introverts are actually fun to talk to. (Ofcourse, if one would allow them to speak at the first place by themselves and not talk over it)

They are born this way, living with extroverts won’t change a thing (which they presume that it would). If only their space was respected, it would make them happy.

Socializing is important but not at the expense of someone’s peace and happiness.

Productivity: Timed To-Do list Works

I started making to-do list and crossing each item from it. It works for me when it is timed, otherwise what remains in the list remains there. Using time efficiently is a talent,  considering you cannot predict the future. There are some important things which need to be kept in mind before following this to-do list.

1. Be flexible
In a timed to-do list, everything is planned beforehand and there is very less room for flexibility.  So, if one has to prioritize the task on hand from the task planned before then the point of having timed to-do list becomes obscure. It is not always like that,  so with little flexibility things can still be done with the help of the list.

2. Be realistic.
We have to be realistic with the goals, if we will put everything on a day’s task without knowing how much time each task will take then it will only create a series of disappointment and demotivation. We cannot exactly know the time for a task, we can only guess and again be flexible if the task takes more time than we thought before.

3. Take care of your body and mind.
Include mindful and physical exercises. It is important to take care of our own body first. The tasks would look much easier when done with sound body and mind.

4. Plan ahead.
I usually prepare my to-do list in the morning with a clear head. Some people make it at night,  it depends on people preference but I don’t like going through a list of task just before going to bed.

I am the person who just hate routines . This one so far worked for me and kept me on tracks. It also saved me from the disappointments of procrastination. 

What productive planner works for you? Share it in the comment section.  🙂

A fear to be full-time writer

I am just afraid of being a full time writer. It has lots of uncertainties like how I will be paid and when I will be paid. Also, if the content that I have provided is of value to people or not. I, also sometimes be harsh on myself as English is not my first language but it is the language in which I can express myself better.

What is stopping me altogether?

The fear of being rejected. Whenever my work is rejected, I get the sense that it has perhaps no value to the people.

The fear of wasting time on something which won’t amount to anything. As an adult, we just have to understand that what we sow we don’t necessarily reap. There is like whole other situations affecting our result but then I am not able to separate myself from the result.

The fear of not having a story anymore. Just imagine, you are a writer and you are blank. The story you had in yourself is no more with you and is out in the world. What if there is nothing left to give?

The fear of being treated as a useless person or a freeloader. I am waiting for the day when I can have a job and I can pursue writing as my hobby.

What is not making me give up?

The stories are still with me and ready to be told.

I am pretty decent at this. I like writing and sometimes I do write well.

Hope that it would work!

I guess, I will be a full-time writer when my fears list will be shorter and motivation list long.

If you love them, set them free? Seriously?!

Do you love yourself? If yes, then how free are you? Are you absolutely free? Society, laws, rules, schools, people’s expectations, social expectations..etc. considering all this are you free?

Love is an emotion which is viable to change, still we expect two people to be in love forever. When people say in movies, “I am out of love. I am sorry.” I think what they meant was my intellectual interests has changed drastically and you are not able to satisfy me. Because, love is an emotion and it changes all the time. It can be there and it won’t be there and again you develop the same emotions.

Love and sex are two different things, love not necessarily leads to sex. If in the movies they say, “I am out of love, we cannot have sex.” Oh wait! They don’t say that…they just have sex and regret it later on for dramatic effects. Anyways, that would be because of physical incompatibility.

Love is way complicated than to set it free without any boundaries. It is not simple. Many have tried to simplify it by saying, “just love”. You cannot just do that in this society which is unequal, it is not a breeding ground for free love. If you go against all this, and still believe in the concept, “If you love them, set them free” I challenge you to do so and be sane.

We say we love by heart and I believe we do that by brain. We choose our partner which suits the requirements of our brain. For the world, a couple’s love could be seen as a beautiful love story but only the couple knows what they have been through together. The days they spent together must have brought them a million emotions, probably more than that.

Now the question is, what’s the harm in simplifying a complicated emotion like love?

Well, some things are meant to be complicated. Like your every other emotion, you cannot just decode why you feel the way you feel now. It would be a madhouse if you would try to decode each on of them.

Kite

I was soaring high
Though tied to the ground
A pale hand rustling through the thread

It let me go and then steer me back
Let me go again
I was flying
Piercing through the strong wind

I am just a paper, mind you
But I was made for this
All conditions met
And I am ready for impossible

My bright colors in this blue sky
Some people look at me in amazement
While the one
Who is keeping me grounded
Know when to let loose.

I was stuck
On a tree
Every stem piercing through me
The thread drops
The hope fades

I am useless now
I don’t do what I was made to do
I sat on the tree
Decaying
Remembering
My former glory

I saw some new ones flying
And smiled at them
Don’t regret anything
Atleast I lived when I should have

“You must do what you ought to do,
Even if it kills you.”

FO: Fever Overthinking

After covishield vaccination,  I am on bed for almost two days. I have an intense pain on my left arm and fever which comes and goes. I feel that whenever I am down physically, I grasp the importance of physical well being. We humans are like that, we value things which are scarce.

When I was fit and healthy, I used to sit depressed. Whenever I am down physically, I feel like standing up and getting things done. Why is it so? Why I appreciate only those things which is scarce? Sometimes I think I couldn’t do anything about it. I want to steer my life in the right direction especially when I have to deal with additional problems like not being healthy. 

I wonder, how can I can change my mindset of giving importance  to scarcity? Can I use it in such a way that it will perhaps benefit me? Or does it work everywhere? If I think about it, time is also scarce then why I feel that it is endless? Why my feeling is so tainted with false beliefs?

So many questions on my mind and I couldn’t think straight.

In the world of internet, smartphones and social media,

I really wish I could just give time more value than I usually do.

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